An alliteratively titled addition after a long absence

Sobriety, n.

A mental disorder in which a person believes he or she is experiencing reality without pesky chemical influences. People who hold such a belief operate under the delusory assumption that their brain does not require a slew of mind-altering chemicals, which include dopamine and norepinephrine and serotonin, to function. In addition, sobriety negatively affects the language centers of the brain. This is exemplified by the sufferer's inability to include the phrase "ingested externally produced substances" in her or his explanation of why being sober is healthier and more pure.